The Pearl Principle

Lately, I’ve been thinking about oysters and Sir Isaac Newton.

And not because I’m hungry or brushing up on high school science.

You may be asking, “What actually is going on in her mind?”

Stay with me on this.

When something gets stuck in an oyster—sand, a piece of shell, an irritant—the oyster reacts by coating it with layers of nacre, which we know as mother of pearl.

Those layers become like a cushion that absorbs shock, resists cracks, and adds toughness. They shimmer with luster when the light hits just right. And this process isn’t quick. Sometimes it takes up to four years.

What results is a pearl.

Interesting, for sure, but what about Sir Isaac Newton, you ask?

Newton gave us the laws of physics. His third law of motion is: “Every action has an equal and opposite reaction.”

You see it when a bird flies, a fish swims, a car drives, or a rocket launches. Even when you lean on a wall, the wall leans back with equal force.

So, what does that have to do with oysters?

Here’s where I’ll take some scientific leeway (or maybe not). What if the oyster’s reaction to the irritant follows Newton’s law…the bigger the irritant, the bigger the pearl?

I don’t know if that’s technically true, but it makes perfect sense when you consider it in this context.

Now…let’s apply that to our lives.

As we move through the journey of life, we come across challenges, plot twists, and yes, even irritants. What if we thought of those as our grains of sand?

What if, instead of fighting them, we layered learning, growth, and resilience over them, allowing something unexpectedly beautiful to form? Something we never could have imagined. 

And in the end, we don’t just have challenges. We have pearls.

I’ve seen this in my own life, and as I share in my memoir A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to My Life, this has happened time and again.

The fire that burned our house down opened the door to the home we now love, and even to a second house.
That led me to explore working with clay, making ceramics, and eventually opening my own pottery and art studio when circumstances shifted and became uncomfortable.
And childhood challenges? They shaped my independence, nudged me to graduate high school early, and eventually led me across the country to grow on my own.

Just like the distance an arrow flies is dependent on how far the bow is pulled back, and where it hits depends on the aim, I suggest that the size of the challenge is related to the size of the resulting pearl. 

I’ve witnessed this in my life. 

After years of holding back, arguing with myself about writing my memoir and sharing my stories, when I finally allowed it to go out into the world, amazing opportunities were placed in my path.

It was as if the arrow had been pulled all the way back. The trajectory was incredible. K

It started with a Times Square billboard, then speaking on global stages, international business and book awards…and a movie. Of course, all of that involved travel to cities and countries I had not previously visited. England, Dublin, and Australia. Not to mention an Irish castle…

The largest, most beautiful pearl! 

Even the exciting milestones—such as a new school, a job, a marriage, children, or stepping into business ventures—came wrapped in their own challenges.

But each one? Every bit of grit, growth, and learning? Another pearl. Together they’ve become a string of pearls I never could have imagined, tough, luminous, and uniquely mine—a string of life pearls. 

What about you?

Can you look back and see your pearls? Can you add today’s grit, today’s challenge, today’s opportunity to that incredible string you’re creating?

Maybe Newton was right and his law does apply to life: every challenge really does create an equal and opposite reaction—the chance to grow a pearl.

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