Who is Joe Spiritual? Ways To Tell If Spirituality Is Authentic

Probably not supposed to admit this (being a spiritual teacher and all), but one of my biggest pet peeves is when people feign being spiritual. I’m sure you’ve met them. They have the vernacular memorized, cliches perfected, all delivered with a woo-woo-esq, wise-appearing Mona Lisa smile. 

These pretenses have become so engrained that they may not even realize they’re faking. 

How do I know? Been there, done that, especially in the beginning of my own spiritual journey. In other words, my attitude comes from life through both sides. 

The thing is, most actors know that eventually the curtain goes down and the show is over. They scrub off their makeup and return to their ordinary existence. But what if that actor had been starring in the play so long that they’ve forgotten they’re acting? Even though the applause has ceased, the audience has left the theater, and they’re no longer receiving a paycheck, they’re amnesiac being caught in a role.  

After helping thousands get in touch with their authentic selves by discovering the subconscious origins of numerous acts, I’ve observed one frequent occurrence: The universe does something dramatic to help bust façades. A traumatic event of some kind; someone calling them out on their phoniness; enough people expressing disdain from their Pollyanna-ish retorts; etc. 

Or they might just realize that not being real is more painful than keeping up a well-polished front.  

In my personal experience, it’s almost impossible to maintain a Joe Spiritual act when up against what life presents. People see though it even if we believe we’ve fooled them. Who do they think they’re kidding, anyway?

Truth is, every one of us is on a spiritual journey. An important part of that process is removing the masks we’ve taken on so we can evolve to our truest self. However, with so many teachings offering techniques to disguise our humanness, ‘act as if’ and ‘fake it until we make it’, that journey ends up being an enlightened-sounding approach to avoid being real.

Here are a few ways Joe Spiritual shows up:

Acting Positive

Joe Spiritual is proficient at affecting positivity, even in situations that most humans would define as sad or hopeless. They sugar coat negative events systematically, encouraging others to ‘look at the bright side’ even in tragedies. You tell them your best friend was murdered and their upbeat response is “Well, at least they went quickly.”

‘It’s all good’ is their motto, pretending they are just fine no matter what’s going on in their lives. They use spirituality to deny their humanness, their emotions, the natural pain they feel when experiencing loss. 

IMHO, no matter how evolved one is, a truly spiritual person allows emotions to be felt without judgment until they run their course. Then, and only then, they choose to look at situations from a spiritual perspective to discover how it was all good. 

Be in the Now

Joe Spirituals espouse letting go of the past, loudly insisting that we ‘be here now.’ They call people out when sharing painful stories, admonishing them to just move on. That’s all well and good but forcing oneself to deny the past is one more way to suppress pain rather than understand, resolve and release it. Simply being heard compassionately, without judgment, might be all they need to get past their pain. 

This philosophy can include avoiding planning, going with the flow, trusting the process.  Spontaneity sounds nice, but most of life does need at least some planning. Not finding a vacant hotel room while on vacation; not saving enough money for retirement; having a cell phone die mid business call; not being prepared for the winter snow living in the mountains – certainly not fun. 

Evenly balancing planning and trusting sure works better.

Manifesting

The current catch phrase in spiritual circles is: ‘Just believe and you will receive.’  Yes, there is powerful energy in our thoughts. However, emphasizing this can make people feel inept at not having good enough thoughts, or being incompetent at harnessing them.

It takes a lot more than training thoughts to manifest one’s heart’s desire. It takes discovering those pesky, programmed negative beliefs, especially hidden deservingness issues, and releasing them from the source. Otherwise, they are just suppressed. 

Listening to, trusting and taking action from an intuitive place is part of the manifestation process as well, something not many are adept at. 

Authenticity Rules

All of the above ways of being, when coming from an authentic place, are lofty goals to attain along a spiritual path. But Joe Spirituals use them as denial and avoidance tactics. Not only does that not work, but it can cause physical problems, emotional reactiveness, and a permanently embedded Joker mask.

True spirituality is not always easy since it involves digging deeply and confronting fears, insecurities, false beliefs, societal expectations, karmic patterns. A spiritual person is willing to confront their denial (AKA shadows), knowing that getting there will allow a truth-filled life.   

Spirituality is also knowing that their life was chosen, recognizing their choices and learning higher consciousness lessons from them. They know that each life is for cleaning up and balancing out anything they’ve done in the past, as well as manifesting their destined purpose. 

A spiritual path is not about comparing journeys or finding the ‘right’ way to evolve. It’s about honoring one’s unique path as well as respecting the diversity in others’ spiritual experiences. It’s knowing that, although we might be taking different routes, we are all getting to the top of the mountain. Eventually.

Telling the Difference

How can you know if someone’s spirituality is genuine, or just another way to impress people, get attention, validation, control, and avoidance? 

As one who not only supports students’ spiritual journeys, but has been on my own inner discovery process for decades, I’ve become skilled at telling the difference. Granted, these subjective perceptions are not etched in stone, but there is truth in all of them. 

As you read through ways to discern the difference between genuine spirituality and an ego trip, make sure to look inside to see if there might be a bit of a Joe (or Josephine) Spiritual running your show. Notice any judgmental thoughts – they are clues to look at a mirror!

1. Genuine Humility
   
   True spirituality produces a natural sense of humility. There’s acceptance that we are a tiny part of a boundless universe yet feel an non severable connection with everyone and everything. There is a knowing that we are all the same manifesting in unique ways, learning individual lessons in these bodies, and teaching others in ways we may not be aware of.
   
   Using spirituality to exclude, judge, or belittle others misses the point of conscious evolution. A spiritual person knows there are many paths to enlightenment and respects all of them, never asserting superiority over any. They would never stand on a pedestal proclaiming I’m so much more evolved than you.
   
   This journey shows that there is always more to learn and endless experiences to grow from. Authenticity admits to not having all the answers, knowing that there is truth and value in all teachings.
   
   There is trust based on experience that everything that happens was chosen to assist in personal as well as planetary evolution. It may take time to see the Bigger Picture, but it all makes sense in retrospect. 
   
   
2. Lessons from Triggers
   
   True spiritual people react to criticism and challenging events with grace, even gratitude for the opportunity to reflect deeper within. If they find themselves getting defensive, taking something personally, feeling judged, insulted or invalidated, they recognize that their primitive consciousness (fight, flight, freeze) has been triggered. They have learned to stop, look within and see what their reaction is really about rather than obeying the demands of their triggers.
   
   No matter how much they resist, they know that when a button is pushed, they are being presented a way to look within to discover a mirror. They willingly acknowledge their denial and see what it’s about. Even if it takes a while.
   
   
3. True Inner Joy
   
   Although many New Age philosophies equate spirituality with power to manifest desires, a truly spiritual person knows that material possessions do not create happiness or fulfillment. Not to say that spirituality means living a meager existence, but they know that they can own but not be attached to material things.
   
   
4. Inner Peace
   
   Those who are genuinely spiritual don’t crave external validation, recognition or approval from others. They feel content within themselves, and don’t share their spiritual experiences hoping for praise or reassurance. They know their spirituality is a personal journey, not a performance for others or an achievement to show off. They know it is enough to just be an example.
   
   
5. Sincere Gratitude
   
   A key aspect of authentic spirituality is a consistent feeling of gratitude, appreciating the simple joys of life, acknowledging blessings as well as challenges. However, they don’t use feeling grateful to bypass other emotions. They can look back at the story of their life and understand the perfection as to why things happened in the ways they did. Then gratitude becomes a natural byproduct.
   
   
6. Ego Balance
   
   Spirituality and ego are often seen as polar opposites, yet they can coexist as partners within this human form. If used in a pure way, the ego can help define individuality and navigate the world. But when it dominates thoughts and actions, it causes problems on a spiritual journey, getting in the way of sincere compassion and connection. Being authentically spiritual means observing the ego without judgment and experiencing a shared humanity minus feeling elevated above others.
   
   
7. Spirituality Patrol
   
   Being aware of these signs doesn’t give permission to monitor others’ spirituality or have one more way to feed that needy ego. Keep in mind that there are no spiritual exams to pass and no boxes to fit inside this deeply personal journey.
   
   Instead, let this understanding further compassion, empathy and tolerance in your interactions with others. After all, each of us is on our own twisting path with myriad lessons to learn (and teach) as we connect with our higher self, reveal and live our purpose, and unfold to inner peace that transcends this physical reality.
   
   Growing secure in your own spirituality allows you to become better at discerning where someone’s spirituality is coming from — authenticity or ego. Plus, it will enable you to see beyond their (your) Joe Spiritual act and connect with their (your) deeper spiritual essence. 
   
   And that is what we all truly deserve.

TAKE ACTION: If you feel ready to explore who you are and what you are here to do, reach out to Royce at royce@roycemorales.com or visit her website at www.roycemorales.com.